


Seeing Red

by BlueJay_Silvertongue



Category: Supergirl (TV 2015)
Genre: F/F, Fix-it for Supergirl Season 4 finale, Lena Luthor Knows Kara Danvers Is Supergirl, Lena throws a bottle of wine, WE NEEDED A CONVERSATION DAMMIT
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-20
Updated: 2019-05-20
Packaged: 2020-03-08 16:02:25
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,569
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18897976
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BlueJay_Silvertongue/pseuds/BlueJay_Silvertongue
Summary: Lena confronts Kara after game night. Fix-it for the SuperCorp reveal in 4x22.





	Seeing Red

**Author's Note:**

  * Translation into 中文 available: [【翻译】Seeing Red](https://archiveofourown.org/works/18944272) by [R_H_Felidae_Athena](https://archiveofourown.org/users/R_H_Felidae_Athena/pseuds/R_H_Felidae_Athena)



They cheer when she steps in, poker face on, gaze sweeping over the crowd, liars, each one of them. But then again, she’s a Luthor, adopted into the most deceptive family in the nation.

What was she expecting?

“Where’ve you been?”

_Oh, Kara, Kara, Kara…_

She sounds so happy. So clueless.

Lena remembers a time when she used to feel like that.

“I—I didn’t know what to bring, so I brought red and white.”

They cheer again, and J’onn says something about teams, but Lena doesn’t listen as she turns her back and sets the heavy bottles onto the counter. She’d imagined marching into Kara’s apartment, maybe smashing the bottles over her head, demanding answers, but—

“J’onn is making us switch up the usual teams.”

Lena raises an eyebrow as a mournful Kara appears at her elbow, seizing the bottle of white almost before she’s had a chance to put it down.

“I should think it’s your house, your rules,” Lena says lightly, watching the Kryptonian shake her head as she refills her snack plate. She looks just like her, _just_ like Supergirl, how could she have fooled herself for so long...

“Listen, um…” Kara fiddles absently with her glasses, staring at the ground, then she stops herself and rests a hand on Lena’s arm. “Wait, are you okay? You went to talk to Lex, and then…”

“ _...now receiving reports that Lex Luthor has been found dead from a gunshot wound, investigators and law enforcement are now on the scene…”_

Kara’s eyes flick toward the TV screen, then back over to Lena.

“You don’t have to worry about Lex anymore.”

_You, Supergirl, cousin of Superman, don’t have to worry about Lex Luthor anymore…_

An edge has creeped its way into Lena’s voice, but she shakes her hair back and looks Kara in the face. She stares back, connecting the dots, then looks away again.

“Listen, I… I was wondering if we could talk. Later, tonight. I really want to… talk. To you.”

Lena almost laughs.

It’s an angry laugh, a painful laugh, almost as red and bitter as the untouched wine on the counter beside them.

“...tonight?”

“Yeah, I mean, I just…” Kara shifts her feet, looking awkward, but then she relents. “I mean, no—no! You’ve been through hell, the world has been through… you’re right, let’s just enjoy tonight, we can talk tomorrow. Of course.”

“If you want to talk tonight, let’s talk tonight,” Lena says cooly, pouring herself a glass of red. Kara opens her mouth, but Lena pushes her way past and goes back to the couch without another word.

And Kara lingers by the counter for another moment, then turns and makes her way back to the group, a little worry line over her forehead.

 

* * *

 

 

Lena wants to leave. But she can’t bring herself to leave, not even as the night wears on, and everyone is pretending, and she can’t take another second it, of how damned _normal_ it is for them, lying to her, acting like she’s a _fool—_

“That is the _last_ time we are telling Brainy beforehand what card game we’re playing,” Alex groans, pushing the last of the chairs back around the dining room table.

_“Seriously,_ I know it’s not technically cheating, but…”

“I’m so happy it worked out with him and Nia, they’re really cute together.”

“Yeah, well they’re not the only _cute togethers_ I saw happening tonight…” Kara teases, and Alex throws a pillow at her.

And then the bottle of wine smashes across the floor.

The Danvers sisters turn to stare at Lena’s figure standing motionless in the kitchen. The half-empty bottle of red is splattered across the hardwood like blood.

“Oh my God, Lena, are you okay? Let me just get, I’m so sorry…”

And Kara races to get a mop, spouting apologies the entire time even though it’s _Lena_ who dropped the wine, and _Lena_ who made this mess, and _Lena_ who can’t move…

Kara pauses and looks up at her.

“…are you okay?”

And Lena stares back, then raises her head without answering.

“Alex, would you please give us a moment.”

Alex is frozen across the room, but she jerks and says,

“I—yeah, sure, I’ll just…” And then she’s hurried to the front door, and it shuts behind her, leaving them alone.

Kara’s still on her knees, staring up at her, mop and dustpan in hand, wine and glass scattered between them.

“I know.”

The mop clatters to the floor.

“Lena—”

“Lex told me, before he died.” Lena can’t remember the last time she’s spoken this coldly to Kara before. She and _Supergirl_ have had no shortage of bitter words, but _Kara…_ “He called me a fool. And he was right.”

“Lena, wait, I can expl—”

_“Don’t. Talk._ Don’t even—you've had your chance, Kara, God, you've _had_ your chance, _so_ many chances to talk, to, to…” And she’s shouting, but there are tears in her eyes, and her poker face is slipping, everything is slipping, and Lex is dead and laughing at her from the grave, _that’s my girl,_ Lillian had said, and Lena had felt nothing, after all these years of waiting and hoping and dying for those words and acceptance from her mother, it had meant _nothing,_ and Kara is looking up at her, those big puppy eyes teary, and then… she takes her glasses off. And she sets them aside, and fumbles on the counter for one of the napkins to blow her nose, wipe her eyes.

“I just wanted a normal friend for once,” Lena whispers. “Someone who accepted me for who I was, who didn’t look at me like an extension of my family.” 

_Loss does strange things to my family and I have lost a lot of people…_

_Well, you’re not gonna lose me… I will always be your friend. And I will always protect you. I promise._

Even then. Even…

“That’s all I wanted, too.”

Kara’s voice is soft, pleading. And for a moment, Lena feels herself wanting, wanting to forgive her, wanting to accept it, whatever it is, whatever it takes for them to go back to normal again… but she looks down, and Supergirl’s face is staring up at her, Supergirl, who lied to her all these years, who convinced her friends—Alex, James, Brainy—to lie, too, who took her for a _fool—_

And before she knows what she’s doing, Lena has thrown the bottle of white down onto the floor to join the red, and then she turns on her heel and storms out, unable to look her best friend in the face a moment longer.

When she pushes past Alex waiting in the hall, she mumbles a short, _“Kara needs you”_ and ignores Alex’s calls for her to wait.

 

* * *

 

Lena can’t stop drinking.

Before she met Kara Danvers, she would stroll into her office and pour herself a glass of water, like a healthy person trying to stay hydrated. Like someone who had hope for the world, for new beginnings, fresh starts.

Now she drinks on the job and… smashes pictures of her ex-friends, apparently.

Lena pauses for a moment to glance at the cracked frame. She doesn’t remember doing that. She doesn’t remember much of anything after she got back from Kara’s apartment, which is strange, because she can remember every single second that happened before, as if it’s been burned into her memory: Lex parading footage of Kara/Supergirl on the screen behind him, holding out his bloody palm to her face, calling her a fool, ridiculing her for being alone…

_I’m here for a fresh start, let me have one._

“So much for _that,”_ Lena mutters into her cup of brandy before letting the burning liquid fill her mouth and silence her once more.

_“To Supergirl… once we lost our trust in you. But I promise you, we will never let that happen again.”_

Lena flicks off the TV and Colonel Haley’s solemn voice, plunging the room back into semidarkness, and tosses the remote onto the desk. And for a second, she thinks about getting up, but she only reaches once more for her cup and takes a long sip.

“You know that’s not really an entrance.”

She doesn’t turn around, but the balcony creaks, and Supergirl steps tentatively into her office.

She doesn’t speak, but Lena can see the suit in her peripheral vision, the blue and red—and that warsuit she’d made for her just waiting at the push of a button.

_There used to be a day when I couldn’t bear the thought of losing you. Maybe even then, I knew…_

“Shouldn’t you be off making a speech somewhere?”

Kara seems to take that as an invitation to inch her way forward, and her blue eyes flicker over the smashed picture frame on the desk.

“I just came to… say I’m sorry. And I’d like to explain, but I also understand if you don’t want to talk to me for a while… or ever again.”

Lena sighs and leans back in her chair, an eyebrow raised. The silence stretches, then she says quietly,

“I’m listening.”

Supergirl lets out a sigh of relief, but Lena doesn’t smile back, only nods for the Kryptonian to sit down, like they’re doing an interview, only this time Kara is answering the questions, and Kara is the source: the source of her anger, and pain, and confusion—but also her source of happiness, and laughter, and warmth…

Or at least she used to be.

“I, ahh… I don’t really know how to start, I guess I... ever since I was a little girl, I hid my powers, I hid who I really was, made up a fake story about where I was from. And I always wanted to just… be free. To be like my cousin, off saving people, using my gifts and abilities to be a force for good, but people kept telling me that I couldn’t, that it was too dangerous, that I should just settle for a normal life, and… and when Lex Luthor tried to kill Superman, I started to believe them, that the world wasn’t _ready_ for aliens, for people with superpowers.”

“You had already been Supergirl for a year when you met me,” Lena says pointedly, and Kara raises her hands.

“I know. I know, and I’m getting to that. I should’ve told you sooner. I should’ve told you from… from the moment you invited me to your gala and took down Chet Miner’s gang, or when you turned against your mother and had her arrested, or… or—” Kara’s voice trails off, her hands flailing aimlessly.

“But you didn’t.”

“I wanted to, but—”

“But you _didn’t.”_ Lena’s voice cracks, and Kara crosses her arms tightly and turns her face away, looking miserable.

“I wanted to. So many times. I wanted to tell you, I almost did, but the longer it went on, the harder it got, the more I knew it would hurt—” 

“I asked you to your _face,”_ Lena says in disbelief, her lips curled up into a smile that she wishes was more cruel and less hurt. “When we were going after Reign, you had the gall to accuse me of betraying you, of not being honest with you, and when I asked you to tell me your real name, you threw _Luthor_ back at me.”

“I know. I know, I know, _I know.”_ And Kara reaches out and takes her hand, and her own warm palms are trembling. “I’m sorry. I’m so sorry. I’ve been a terrible friend, and I understand if you never forgive me, but I swear, I _promise_ I did it because I didn’t want to hurt you. And—and the longer it went on, the more I… the more I didn’t want to hurt you. And now I have. And I don’t know if I can ever make this right, but I want to, and I _want_ to make this right, I want to, I’ll do anything. Anything to make it up to you. _Anything.”_

_Then you can leave,_ Lena Luthor of yesterday would’ve snapped. _You don’t have to do anything, Kara,_ she would’ve said last week. But it’s not yesterday, it’s not last week, it’s not last month, or last year. It’s now. And the secret is out… and she can’t keep putting her feelings into little boxes anymore.

“Take off your suit.”

Kara stares at her, mouth open, the faintest color creeping up into her cheeks.

“...what?”

“I mean _change,_ Kara,” Lena snaps, ignoring the blush rising up from her own neck. “I can’t take you seriously when you’re wearing that little… cheerleader outfit.”

And Kara shuts her mouth, looking both offended and embarrassed, and in an instant, she’s disappeared and reappeared wearing one of her reporter outfits, glasses on. Lena feels herself relax slightly at the sight of her, as if Kara is somehow less terrifying than Supergirl, even though it’s Kara who betrayed her, and Kara who lied to her, and Kara who made a fool out of her.

They sit in silence for a long moment, staring at each other as if for the first time, Lena wondering how she ever convinced herself that the thing she’d always suspected wasn’t true.

“Who… are you, exactly?” Lena says, keeping her voice neutral. Kara shifts slightly, adjusting her glasses.

“I’m, um, Kara Danvers, I work for CatCo Magazine… sort of.”

“...and?”

Kara swallows visibly and forces herself to go on.

“And... I’m Kara Zor-El, from Krypton. But Supergirl is not who I am, it’s what I do. It’s like a job. A dangerous job, for—for me, and for everyone around me.”

Lena tilts her head slightly, then she gives a small smile and says pointedly,

_“There.”_

Kara’s eyes are wide and unsuspecting behind her glasses.

“...there?”

And Lena rises and comes around the desk, sitting in front of Kara’s nervous figure, and then she leans forward and says in her ear,

_“Was that so hard?”_

And Kara stammers incoherently as Lena slowly pulls away, eyes never leaving her face.

“Now. Go get us some food. Some burgers, maybe? And extra fries, since you always _steal_ mine.”

“I—I can’t, it’s almost midnight, they’re all closed,” Kara breathes, her glasses askew. Lena sighs and plucks them off of her face.

“Not the ones in Hawaii.”

Kara stares as Lena puts her glasses onto her own face and raises an eyebrow at her, arms crossed, foot tapping impatiently.

_“God,_ that’s—that’s…” Kara sputters.

_“Anything to make it up,_ you said,” Lena says casually, reaching out to prod Kara’s bare knee with her toe. “Get going, Supergirl.”

And Kara can’t hide the wide smile on her face even as she grumbles and changes into her suit right there in the middle of Lena’s office. 

“Anything, and you chose _food?”_ she says, snapping out her cape and strolling towards her, one hand out for her glasses.

“I’m not done yet,” Lena says smugly, looking at her over the tops of the frames, making no move to take them off. And Kara gets a peculiar look on her face and takes another step forward, then stops herself.

“Food first.”

“Food first,” Lena repeats, and then Supergirl wavers for a moment, then quickly leans in to brush the lightest kiss against her cheek, and then she’s gone, the barest speck of red flying off into the night.

 

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading! I desperately needed for Kara and Lena to TALK about it, and the show didn't deliver and won't for months, so here's a little fixit to hopefully assuage the pain (I wish!).
> 
> Also, I literally just slapped this together in a post-finale frenzy, and at some point, I'll come back and actually read/edit this thing.


End file.
